Mommy Needs a Drink: The Effect of the Wine Mom “Culture”

The wine mom culture makes being an alcoholic mom look relaxing and fun. The posts on social media boast how Mommy needs a drink. The wine mom culture has become an acceptable form of binge drinking, leading to a wine addiction

What is Wine Mom “Culture”?

A relatively new term, wine mom culture, refers to the growing number of moms using wine to de-stress from parenting. “Mommy needs a drink” is a common phrase encouraged through social media and various companies. 

Although the wine mom culture exploded in the late 2000s, early signs of the wine mom started in 2009. Social media and online platforms, for example, have brought people with common interests together. For instance, in 2009, a Facebook group called “ Moms Who Need Wine” formed and has over 700,000 followers. 

Wine Mom: Binge Drinking and Wine Addiction

The NIAAA (National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism) defines binge drinking as four drinks for women and five drinks for men in 2 hours. Binge drinking already dominates college campuses across the country.

The wine mom culture is another reason to binge drink. Along with all the “mommy needs a drink” jokes, binge drinking can lead to wine addiction. Even if you only drink two glasses a night, it can eventually become four glasses a night. This increase can be a serious issue and even lead to wine addiction.

Women and Binge Drinking Statistics

According to the CDC, excessive alcohol use plays a role in 27,000 female deaths a year. Women and binge drinking also have the following statistics.

  • Almost half of women report drinking in the past 30 days.
  • About 13% of women report binge drinking an average of 4 times a month. Furthermore, they typically consume five drinks each time.
  • 18% of women ages 18 to 44 binge drink
  • In 2019, 8% of women 18 to 25 struggled with alcohol use disorder, including wine addiction.

Why Does an Alcoholic Mom Drink?

In the case of a wine mom, she finds it helpful to have wine to cope with her children. There are many happy times in parenting. However, there are also stressful times. The challenging times are when you hear a wine mom say, “Mommy needs a drink.” 

Wine Mom: Binge Drinking and Wine Addiction

A few reasons a mom becomes a wine mom include:

  • Instant stress relief and gratification. Alcohol provides immediate relief for mom’s stressed from raising children.
  • Lack of a support system. Mom’s without another person to help with the kids never get a break. This can cause them to drink to escape. 
  • No, “me time.” Moms never have enough “me time,” so they use being a wine mom as a reason to drink.
  • Mental health issues. Mothers struggling with depression or anxiety are at a higher risk of becoming an alcoholic mom. Additionally, self-medicating to ease the stress often results in an alcoholic mom.

An alcoholic mom can develop various physical and psychological issues, including wine addiction. But, a comprehensive dual-diagnosis program treats all aspects of addiction, which has positive effects on the whole family. 

An Alcoholic Mom and Her Children

The children of an alcoholic mom also suffer. The NIAAA estimates 6.6 million children have at least one parent with alcohol use disorder. These children are also twice as likely to struggle with substance use disorder

Girls who hear their mom say, “mommy needs a drink,” and who see their mom drink wine to cope with stress may become a wine mom as well. A child may also have to take on parental roles such as grocery shopping when their alcoholic mom has a wine addiction. As the responsibilities pile up, it can lead to a wine addiction or other destructive behaviors.

How Can an Alcoholic Mom Cope With Stress Without Drinking?

If you are a mom who is stressed out, it can be easy to pour a glass of wine to relieve stress. However, there are various holistic ways to de-stress without being a wine mom. These activities are more beneficial to you and your family.

Take a bath.

Do you want to boost your mood? Take a bath. Make it luxurious – pour in bubbles and Epsom salts and grab a bath pillow. Turn on some calming music and light some candles. Replacing “Mommy needs a drink” with “Calgon take me away” is a healthy way to cope with parenting stress.

 Get active.

Whether breaking a sweat in the gym or taking a nice walk through your neighborhood, exercise is great for your mental health. So, hit the gym, walk the dog, or do some yoga. If you like books, put in the earbuds and put on an audiobook. 

Exercise your brain.

For some people, working their brain is relaxing. Sitting outside in the sun doing a jigsaw puzzle or snuggling under a blanket playing a game on your phone can quiet the thoughts running through your brain.

Be creative.

Being creative is good for your health. What do you like? Is it drawing, painting, knitting, or sewing? Watching cooking videos and recreating dishes is also a form of creativity. Another form of creativity is planting bright flowers, which you can admire every day.

Clean or organize something.

A clean and decluttered house not only reduces stress but boosts productivity and sleep. Many people find cleaning to be relaxing. Getting the kids involved in cleaning their room can also give you a chance to de-stress. 

Connect with other people.

Sometimes, you just need a friend to talk with. Since a lot of communication is done via text, it is nice to pick up the phone and have a conversation. Connecting with others is crucial to our mental health. If you are needing a connection but don’t want to be around people, snuggle your pet. If you don’t have a pet, go volunteer at a shelter or foster one.

How Can an Alcoholic Mom Prevent Relapse in a Wine Mom “Culture”?

Recovering from wine addiction is challenging enough, but adding motherhood’s stress can seem like an impossible challenge. However, watching what moms in long-term recovery do and what those who relapse do can encourage your recovery from wine addiction.

4 Ways a Wine Mom Can Prevent Relapse in Wine Addiction

  1. Build a healthy community. Joining a support group with other moms recovering from wine addiction is crucial to your recovery. Only another alcoholic mom can understand the struggles of wanting to scream, “Mommy needs a drink.”
  2. Release your resentments. Resentment can destroy your recovery. For instance, holding on to bitterness can keep you in the victim mode. Learning to control your anger is critical to treating wine addiction. Stepping back and taking a moment can give you a new perspective, which results in a healthy response. 
  3. Practice daily spirituality. Addiction kills our spirit. But, daily spirituality can bring it back to life and help a wine mom beat her wine addiction. At the same time, spirituality is not religion. It means different things to different people and may include yoga, dancing, spending time in nature, or finding the meaning of life.
  4. Practice H.A.L.T. Stop and ask yourself, “Am I hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. If the answer is yes, then fix the issue. For example, if your hungry, then eat. And, if your angry, then take a walk. Just do not pick up a drink.

Treating the Wine Mom, the Alcoholic Mom and the Mom Screaming Mommy Needs a Drink

Admitting you have a wine addiction is the first step in addiction treatment. Accepting that you’re a wine mom with a wine addiction isn’t easy. But, once you do, the recovery can begin.

Although there no cure for wine addiction, treatment can help manage triggers and cravings, which increases your Recovery for Life. A comprehensive addiction treatment plan for an alcoholic mom may include:

  • Detox
  • Behavioral therapies
  • Psychotherapy
  • Pharmacotherapy or medication-assisted therapy

Detox for Wine Addiction

Depending on your wine addiction, your treatment may start with detox. Detox is typically done in an inpatient treatment center and lasts about a week. Because some symptoms of withdrawal can be life-threatening, medications may help ease these symptoms. 

Symptoms of detox may include:

  • Nausea or vomiting
  • Tremors
  • Confusion
  • Headache
  • Fatigue
  • Cravings

Behavioral Therapies to Replace Mommy Needs a Drink

You may be addicted to the act of drinking just as much as the alcohol itself. For this reason, treatment plans generally include behavioral therapies. In therapy, you learn coping skills and activities to replace the activities of addiction. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), for instance, helps in wine addiction treatment by:

mommy needs a drink
  • Understanding how thoughts and beliefs affect addiction
  • Providing the tools you need to improve mood and increase recovery.
  • Teaches healthy communication skills

Psychotherapy for the Wine Mom

Psychotherapy or “talk therapy” is between the wine mom and a therapist. It helps moms deal with their emotional problems and mental health issues. Individual therapy also teaches tools to cope with triggers and prevent relapse. 

Benefits of psychotherapy include:

  • Heal emotional conflict
  • Builds self-esteem
  • Reduces anxiety
  • Develop healthy communication skills
  • Prevents relapse and encourages Recovery for Life

Pharmacotherapy for Wine Addiction

Medication-assisted therapy, or MAT, is often used in combination with behavioral therapies to treat alcohol use disorder. MAT is particularly helpful for those struggling with physically addictive substances such as alcohol and opioids. 

Benefits of pharmacotherapy include:

  • Alleviate withdrawal symptoms during detox.
  • Suppress cravings in various stages of recovery.
  • Eliminates the euphoric effects of substances
  • Causes adverse side effects when certain substances are consumed.

Get Help at Sana Lake Behavioral Wellness Center

If you are a wine mom who is tired of struggling with wine addiction, help is available today. Our team of professionals is waiting to help you discover and achieve a life free of addiction. Contact us today, and start your recovery journey. 

References:

https://www.niaaa.nih.gov/alcohol-health/overview-alcohol-consumption/moderate-binge-drinking

https://www.cdc.gov/alcohol/fact-sheets/womens-health.htm

https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/aa09.htm